My heart is heavy. We are so paralyzed by polarization across this country and this polarization is a breeding ground for hate and "otherness." As humans, we find ourselves trying to find the balance between finding our own identities, and belonging and being accepted by our various collectives. It is an intricate dance between finding our own voice, and living out the values and beliefs of our people. Our people could be our our families, our churches and religious affiliations, our schools, our communities, and people who look and think like us. While we have engaged in this intricate dance, we have forgotten that it takes place on the stage of our common humanity. And this is precisely how we find ourselves divorced from one another.
We can't seem to find common ground. What would happen if we truly approached one another with the idea of seeking first to understand before foisting our stories and opinions upon one another? What would happen if we took a moment to consider the other? What would happen if we ditched our insatiable desire to be right? What if we actually talked to one another with respect and dignity? What if we at least tried?
I definitely have my own opinions on so many issues that face us as a nation. I can live in those opinions to the extent that they don't rob others of their unalienable rights which include life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. And I understand this. It is one of the beautiful things about being an American. But let us consider how many of our people have the opportunity to truly experience this? WHO gets the opportunity to pursue these things? And before stating our opinions on how EVERYONE can, what would happen if we just LISTENED? What I am observing across our nation is the refusal to listen. The absolute knowing that "my" way is right. The need to be powerful. To be all-knowing. To exclude others and point fingers. To find absolutely nothing the other says to be important or significant. Even amongst those who claim to be open...even these shut others out and mock people for their perspectives. This mocking, this meanness - is what breaks my heart. I believe we are deeply connected to one another and what I do to others, I am doing to myself. Therefore, the lies and untruths that are perpetuated from each side cause the divide to be even greater.
What happened to finding common ground? I KNOW there are things we can agree on. And from this place, the healing begins. WHY do you see things that way? WHY do you feel that way. Have a conversation with me. Do you really hate me because of my opinions? Can we come from a place of love and compassion? Help me to understand.
I will conclude these thoughts with the words of New York Senator Robert Kennedy addressing a crowd after the assassination of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr:
My favorite poet was Aeschylus. He wrote: “In our sleep, pain which cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart until, in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom through the awful grace of God.”
What we need in the United States is not division; what we need in the United States is not hatred; what we need in the United States is not violence or lawlessness; but love and wisdom, and compassion toward one another, and a feeling of justice toward those who still suffer within our country, whether they be white or they be black. So I shall ask you tonight to return home, to say a prayer for the family of Martin Luther King, that’s true, but more importantly to say a prayer for our own country, which all of us love—a prayer for understanding and that compassion of which I spoke. We can do well in this country. We will have difficult times; we’ve had difficult times in the past; we will have difficult times in the future. It is not the end of violence; it is not the end of lawlessness; it is not the end of disorder. But the vast majority of white people and the vast majority of black people in this country want to live together, want to improve the quality of our life, and want justice for all human beings who abide in our land. Let us dedicate ourselves to what the Greeks wrote so many years ago: to tame the savageness of man and make gentle the life of this world. Let us dedicate ourselves to that, and say a prayer for our country and for our people.
This statement is from 1968 and leaves much room for a deeper understanding of the plight of my black bothers and sisters. However, it is my hope that in the spirit of these words, we might search for love and wisdom and compassion for one another. What is your experience? Let's build on common ground.
